I’m a humble man. I know when I’m whipped. I need help from a fellow “enthusiast.” You gun nerds know it’s rough when you look like an idiot in front of your fellow gun nerd. I’m willing to do that here. Thanks in advance to everyone that doesn’t answer this plea for help with: “…put the gun up to your temple.” That might help you, my friends and family but that does nothing for me.

Maybe it’s because I got whored by Nintendo back in the day when the original Mortal Kombat debuted on the consols.  I was a Super Nintendo guy through and through.  You know what that means.  I had to deal with “sweat” instead of blood.  It was god awful.  To get any blood to appear in the game, you had to buy a fucking game genie.  Nintendo has this weird japanese, child touchin, digimon vibe to me, and that’s why I don’t like to support their product anymore.  I mean how horrendous is THIS.  Not only do not buy into this brand of horse shit, I question grown men that do.  I question grown man that are REALLY into Mario Galaxy.  I question grown men  that have Yoshi’s Egg tattoos.  It’s unsettling.  Almost as unsettling to know that it is 2009 and Nintendo still can’t bring itself to admit that guns exist in our society, and people like to play video games that involve them.  Kotaku reporting on the head-slap worthy news:

From Hitler moustaches to “sweat” in Mortal Kombat, Nintendo have a long history of over-reacting to violence in video games. So it shouldn’t surprise you that, in 2009, you’re still not allowed to call a Wii peripheral a “gun”.

Speaking with Game Informer, Activision’s Jeff Muench has said that when branding and promoting the amazing peripheral for the Wii version of Cabela’s Big Game Hunter 2010, the company were prevented by “some obscure Nintendo regulations” from calling it a gun.

Instead, they had to call the large, gun-shaped peripheral made solely for use in a game where things are shot, a “firearm”. Which means exactly the same thing.

For God’s sake, it’s called Big Game Hunter.  It’s in virtually every bar and restaurant in America.  You are not using the gun to shoot cops or hookers or anything nefarious.  You are hunting animals.  Get over your pussywhipped, limpdicked obsession with keeping everyone on earth happy with your girly, childish games.  Adults play game, adults have the money and we fucking adults want fucking GUNS.

Asinine gun laws DO NOT keep firearms out of the hands of criminals. They keep them out of the hands of law abiding citizens. They don’t allow us to shoot back. I hope the governing bodies in New York City give this man a medal. He certainly deserves one.   From the New York Times

They strode into the restaurant supply store in Harlem shortly after 3 p.m. on Thursday, four young men intent on robbery, one with a Glock 9-millimeter pistol, the police said. The place may have looked like an easy mark, a high-cash business with an owner in his 70s, known as a gentle, soft-spoken man.

People tried to see a closer view of the scene. A store owner used a shotgun to blast four armed men who tried to rob the business.
But Charles Augusto Jr., the 72-year-old proprietor of the Kaplan Brothers Blue Flame Corporation, at 523 West 125th Street, near Amsterdam Avenue, had been robbed several times before, despite the fact that his shop is around the corner from the 26th Precinct station house on West 126th Street.

There were no customers in the store, only Mr. Augusto and two employees, a man and a woman. The police said the invaders announced a holdup, approached the two employees and tried to place plastic handcuffs on them. The male employee, a 35-year-old known in the community as J. B., struggled with the gunman, who then hit him on the head with the pistol.

Watching it happen, Mr. Augusto, whom neighborhood friends call Gus, rose from a chair 20 to 30 feet away and took out a loaded Winchester 12-gauge pump-action shotgun with a pistol-grip handle. The police said he bought it after a robbery 30 years ago.

Mr. Augusto, who has never been in trouble with the law, fired three blasts in rapid succession, the police said, although Vernon McKenzie, working at an Internet company next door, heard only two booms, loud enough to send him rushing to a window, where he heard someone shout: “You’re dead! You’re dead!”

The first shot took down the gunman at the front. He died almost immediately, according to the police, who said he was 29 and had been arrested for gun possession in Queens last year and was the nephew of a police officer.

Mr. Augusto’s other two blasts hit all three accomplices, who stumbled out the door, bleeding.

One of them, a 21-year-old, staggered across 125th Street and collapsed in front of the General Grant Houses, a nine-building complex with 4,500 residents, one of the city’s biggest housing projects. Someone called 911, and an ambulance rushed him to St. Luke’s-Roosevelt Hospital Center, where he was dead on arrival. The police said he had a record of arrests for weapons possession and robbery.

Another wounded man left a blood trail that the police followed to 125th Street and Amsterdam Avenue. The fourth wounded man was picked up, on the basis of witness descriptions, at 128th Street and St. Nicholas Terrace. Both were taken to St. Luke’s.

 

The names of the men who were shot — two dead and two wounded — were not immediately released by the authorities. The two at the hospital, both 21 years old, were in stable condition late Thursday night, the police said.

So the criminals got a pistol despite New York’s strict gun legislation?  Huh.  Imagine that.  Maybe Michael Bloomberg should sue Virginia again  for his state’s safety problems.  Or maybe they should give Charles Augusto Jr a statue and tell his story as a triumph is responsible weapons ownership.  Either way, until we live in a utopian society, the bad guys are gonna get guns no matter what you do.  We need to stop keeping the guns away from the honest Americans and look elsewhere for the cause of violent crime.

“An armed society is a polite society. Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life.“  -Robert A. Heinlein 

G4 usually has good nerd content. What better than a group of maniacs with assault rifles drilling in preparation of Zombie Apocalypse? Z.A.P.T, the Zombie Attack Preparedness Team has the right idea. While your brains are getting slurped on by some sort of reanimated corpse from hell, Z.A.P.T and The Fukerton are going to be on top of the Costco drinking PBR and popping zombie skulls. Ya’ll better ask somebody.

I’m not sure when this “G4 Underground” show runs, but I’d love to see this episode. Feel free to share any details you may have aquired while you are stockpiling bottles water and buckshot.

I find this hilarious.  I was born 65 years too late.  If you were allowed to shoot at your wife with a rife back during the depression, then meet me at the graveyard with a shovel cause I’m digging up FDR.  Check out this hilarious description of the above epic:

Husband tests bullet proof glass with his wife. Shot in the early thirties, a man with a rifle tests an early version of bullet proof glass by having his wife hold the glass to her face while he shoots at her.

Romance was not dead back then.

The song stinks and all the people in the video are creepy. Other than that this is a pretty sweet concept.  A minigun that shoots hundreds of rubberbands. I could threaten dozens of grade schoolers with this thing. Not that I spend time in grade schools.

Well, this is awkward.

Meet the newest member of the Fukerton family.   The Judge.  What’s better that a pistol that shoots big bullets?  A pistol that shoots big bullets and shotgun shells.  Are you a meat eating, God fearing American?  If so, get ready to swat at your rod cause it’s gonna burst through those slim fit dungarees you bought last week.  A wise man once said: “You never want to stand in front of a Judge, son.”  It seems that man was correct in more than one way.  Ok, so I made that quote up, but it sounded good in my brain.  Cut me some slack, I’m fired up.  Details courtesy of our good friends at Taurus International:

The “Taurus Judge® ” is so named because of the number of judges who carry it into the courtroom for their protection. Capable of chambering both .410 2-1/2″ shotshell and .45 Colt Ammunition, this amazing combo gun is ideal for short distances - where most altercations occur, or longer distances with the .45 Colt ammo. We have finely tuned the rifling to spread the shot pattern at close quarters or to guide the .45 cal. bullet to the target. Fully customized with fixed rear sights, fiber optic front sights and Taurus Ribber Grips®, the “Taurus Judge” is one decision-maker that lays down the law.

A gun in every room equals a safe house.  So sayeth the book of Fukerton.  I haven’t had a chance to break this sweet piece of iron in yet, but I plan on it.  Most likely helping Frank Castle in apprehending The Kingpin.  This monster was the same price as my Glock 19, so I would say it’s quite a  value.  Let me know if you know of an outdoor range, because there’s nothing like firing off a few rounds with nothing between you and God.  America.  Fuck Yeah.

I’ve always thought so.  Owning a firearm is not only legal, it’s yer civic duty as an American as far as I’m concerned.  Robert A. Heinlein said: “An armed society is a polite society.  Manners are good when one may have to back up his acts with his life.”  Wise words.  Don’t agree with them?  Ask yourself this: if you were a criminal and you knew everyone on a certain block owned a firearm, would you break into those houses?  No, you would go into Chicago or the District of Columbia where the local government does everything they can to deny you your constitutionally protected right to bear arms.

I love it when studies back up what I’ve always known.  When respected Universities shoot down the culture of fear and ignorance that surrounds firearms.  House frows and yentas that try and tell you that if you own a gun, you’re going to blow your foot off.  At best.  Well that doesn’t seem to be the case according to a study done by two different U’s of M

The University of Michigan and University of Maryland study also shows that tighter regulation of gun shows does not appear to reduce the number of firearms-related deaths.  The researchers analyzed data from Texas and California, chosen because they are the nation’s two most populated states, have large numbers of gun shows, and are at opposite ends of the spectrum regarding gun show regulation. California has some of the most aggressive gun show regulations, including background checks for all gun show purchasers and a 10-day waiting period to obtain the firearm. Texas has no similar regulations.

“The absence of gun show regulations does not increase the number of gun-related deaths as proponents of these regulations suggest,” said Jacob, director of its Center for Local, State, and Urban Policy (CLOSUP).

No shit?  So places where people are educated about firearms and have more gun shows…have LESS crime?  So when the commoners have the ability to shoot back at the bad guys it leads to less crime?  That’s mind blowing.  Really.  It’s most likely all bunk.  From some NRA publication right?  Funded by Glock or Sig or Bushmaster?  Oh wait, the article appeared Science Daily.  Click and see for yourself.  Anyone that wants to ban American citizens owning firearms needs to take a history lesson and a gun safety class.  Or just lock the door, and hope they don’t have blasters.